Monday, April 26, 2010
the Lohan demise
Lindsay Lohan, for some particular reason, has always completely fascinated me. When I first saw Mean Girls, and she first started to become a media darling, I wanted to be her. She looked fun, and fresh and was getting paid millions to star in shitridden movies. As the Lilo timelime goes...it was then that the Lohan delusion started to kick in. She got dumped by her first love Wilder Valderama for having too many issues and he couldn't handle that shit. Shortly thereafter, she became known for her frequent,tumultuous, late night visits to clubs all over L.A. She got hella skinny. Like my-arm-is-about-to-snap skinny. Then after all the partying and the thinnification, the drug rumours started to hit. and they hit hard. She managed to by pass those for a while until the production team of the movie Georgia Rule publicly tore her a new asshole claiming she was perpetually late and unprepared for work. She denied, denied, denied. Somehow (probably with a lot of blow) managed to wake up and finish the movie. After a few more "dehydration" and "exhaustion" bouts, studios began to find it hard to insure her for movies. Then they stopped letting her be in them. But the delusional enabling powerhouse that is team lohan continued to allude to the fact that she was indeed fine and pursuing different avenues such as fashion. [She started a crappy, expensive legging line, a spray tan line Sevyn Nine, and single handidly ruined an Ungaro Show as "artistic advisor" and was ultimately fired.] Oh and there was rehab...3 times. To which lilo compared to a "vacation". What a tit. Anyways, one day, after an argument with her assistant, Lindsay jumped in an SUV, with 3 passengers in tow, and went on a highway speedchase after her assistant's mom. She was arrested and oh looky here, the po-po found nose powder in her purse. But it wasn't hers... (insert collective eye roll here)
But Linsday is fine. Right?
Lilo subsequently resorted to being paid for club appearances (perfect job for a pennyless-washed up-cranked out-"rehabilited"-hag right?) and nonetheless failed, FREQUENTLY, to appear at her own "sponsored" events. She then bid farewell to cock and went all ultra lesbo with that skelleton DJ Samantha Ronson for some years. The well respected Ronson family, hated everything about her and pressured Sam into dumping her cranked-out ass. The DRAMA, oh the DRAMA. Lilo brought it in her relationship with Ronson. Did she ever! Videos of her sceaming and crying hysterically to Sam. Audio of them fighting and lohan shrieking. oh the shrieking ! Lohan continuously went on cracked out twitter rampages accusing Sam of cheating on her like every night...it was DRAMA. Ronson caved and DUMPED HER CRAZY ASS.
Now in true Lohan styles, Lilo stalks Ronson. From club to club, event to event. The most recent incident was one where Lilo allegedly threw a glass at Sam's head, which sources confirm indeed happen. Trousdale, the club in which it happened, Banned lilo for good.
BUT IT'S ALL GOOD RIGHT? Dina Lohan thinks every one just picks on Linsday. The media isn't nice and without merit hounds poor Linsday (enter pity party here). Yes Lilo has a messed up family. Her famewhoring father, using her for publicity and professing his devotion to "getting her clean" via TMZ is sickening. Do I feel bad for her? Of course. She's been the Lohan cash cow since day one - of course her mother will side with her. Though Michael is outright disgusting, Dina Enablerlohan is just as bad. "My child is fine" GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK
Linsday once said she didn't get why everyone made a "big deal" about her going out. And in hindsight, it's not. Because most young adult females do. But in the last two weeks alone, Linsday has gone out EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT.until 3-4am. IS THAT FUCKING FINE DINA? Yes, Lilo, People your age, WITH AN ADDICTION PROBLEM, go out as much as you do. See?
Now Linsday has her 35 year old sister in tow (16 in actuality but com'on, look at this kid) and Michael is livid. Dina let's Ali stay with her cranked-out sister. Good intentions or not, Michael is right. THE FUCK? Dina says that Ali is in good hands with Lindsay. Yes the same Linsday who got ejected from the club, BANNED, goes out every night of the week, has been arrested for 2 DUI's and is being sued by the 3 peeps in the car for pretty much being kidnapped, has no job, and refuses to admit she has a problem....but Ali is Fine. Linsday is Fine. Dina is Fine.
They are all fucking crazy.
Will linsday change? No...I suppose it'll take a another drug scandal or another arrest to set her straight. But even then, her ENABLING mother will continue to stroke her ego and squeeze the profitability right out her. Momma's gotta eat right?
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